If at first you don't succeed.

Try, try again they say.

Sometimes it feels the more you try, the more you work to attain a certain goal, the harder things may seem. That I feel, is dead on.

My entire life has been made up of nothing but struggles, heartache, pain, suffering, failures, regret. Every glimmer of hope I find, turns into... I can't even put into words. And yet... I keep trying. Keep keeping on. Why?

It's my way of telling this sick world we live in, this game we call life to go fuck itself. I will damn well make sure I find my happiness. I will have the life I dream of, damn the consequences, damn the discrimination, and damn society.

I'm sick of the life I'm living, so what should I do? Make a better one. One worth living and fighting for. Sure there are times when everything seems to much, and I could take the "easy way" out, but I'm not going to give the negative thoughts the satisfaction. What better way then to prove everything you went through, everything that screams "You will fail!" A big fuck you, and succeed.

Fight for what you believe in. Stay true to yourself. Be free. Be happy.

And most of all, if at first you don't succeed... Try, try again.

Pain. Can't get enough.

Life hurts. Whether physically, emotionally, or metaphorically. How you choose to cope with said pain, will be the degree in which you receive the anguish.

Pain is what helps us know that we are still alive. Still here on this planet. 

Enjoy it.

Walking 4 miles to work and back, and I can barely move. But I have felt things, not only physically, but emotionally. I conquered my negative thinking by proving I have willpower. This pain I feel lets me know that I did it, I surpassed my negative emotions and proved I have what it takes.

I felt happiness. Pushing my body past what I've ever put it through. Happiness that I will be walking 4 miles each way again tomorrow. And the next day.

Happiness. Realizing, that what I've been dreaming of doing, but fail to follow through, might now actually be possible.

Happiness. To truly feel like anything is possible.

Happiness. This pain, this heartache, these tears. Worth everything.